8 replies to this topic

[Yasmin]

aa wr wb

iA this is just a reminder, lets hope it doesnt relate to many (if any) forumites here

The anonymous section is a place where people can ask for sincere advice. However, people on both sides of the coin need to be responsible - the anonymous poster and the replies that all the other forumites give.

The anonymous poster wanting advice - please dont LIE about your problem or make things up for whatever reason. If people ask you a question that you dont want to answer, then simply dont answer it - why lie and take advantage of forumites that are sincerely trying to help you? This could be seen as deception especially if they find out that you have lied to them.

The advising forumites - please give advice in the BEST WAY POSSIBLE, with wisdom and intellect - please THINK before you type. And dont see posting as a guest as a guise for posting irresponsibly and without adequate thought.

Its really important to remember that behind any username or guest name, we are still accountable to Allah and He will see ALL of our actions, whether its done under our "name" or not, so please, just bear that in mind.

Jazakallahu khairan

[fazza]

I could have sworn i read this way earlier; was posted only 17 mins ago though!?

Is this Farasah or Kashf?



Surely the former? *Liasing with the future!*

[Yasmin]

(*rolleyes* you arent imagining things, you probably saw it a few days ago in the Admin section somewhere which is where i started it before moving it into main section )

[rambant]

Thank you for that Yazminh.

[Saif-ur-Rahman]

Yasmin, on Oct 24 2007, 12:15 PM, said:

The advising forumites - please give advice in the BEST WAY POSSIBLE, with wisdom and intellect - please THINK before you type. And dont see posting as a guest as a guise for posting irresponsibly and without adequate thought.

Very well noted.
We should all remember, if we have something good and positive to say, we should say it, if not, we should observe our silence.
Also, I personally do not see the real need to reply to threads as a guest, unless we were to discuss or bring up any personal issues, in which case we may want to stay anonymous.

[Kat]

The whole concept of having a guest anon section where people ask questions about problems and issues is flawed.

This is because anyone can send in questions and issues which would be very hard to verify. Also as mentioned by me and others the people who may have real issues and problems in some cases need advise from people who are qualified to advise them and not from amateurs like most of us.

In my view this section should be scrapped since the risk of abuse is great and is actually happening and will continue to happen as long as people are allowed to post as guests.

The level of immaturity on the main sections is on occasions shocking and that is when people post under there own ID, so of course when they post under anon will be greater.

[rambant]

I must say I disagree bro.

Kat, on Oct 24 2007, 02:13 PM, said:

This is because anyone can send in questions and issues which would be very hard to verify. Also as mentioned by me and others the people who may have real issues and problems in some cases need advise from people who are qualified to advise them and not from amateurs like most of us.

I'm not clear on what the need for verification is, if someone has a problem with their mother in law for instance what is there to verify? If someone wants to marry their boyfriend but their parents won't let them what is there to verify? I don't get it. There may be better places to go for advice, but some people might not have access to such sources, or may be too shy to turn to people in real life. I've seen people give good advice in the anonymous section too.

Quote

The level of immaturity on the main sections is on occasions shocking and that is when people post under there own ID, so of course when they post under anon will be greater.

I think that's part and parcel of cyber life. You get immaturity, but there's no need to begrudge anyone the opportunity of seeking useful advice. I think the section has it's advantages too. Granted there are too many 'my parents won't let me marry bro/sisX' threads, but there are other problems that people have and there are forumites who do provide good islamic evidences and give good practical advice.

[Kat]

@Rambant

Anon section means anyone can post, even a random guest. Their has been quite a few incidents of abuse which has been made public, where people have posted lies just for a joke. Also have you read Yasmins post?

Their is obviously a reality behind her post which can be understood by reading her post.

Here is the pertinant sections

"The anonymous poster wanting advice - please dont LIE about your problem or make things up for whatever reason. If people ask you a question that you dont want to answer, then simply dont answer it - why lie and take advantage of forumites that are sincerely trying to help you? This could be seen as deception especially if they find out that you have lied to them.

The advising forumites - please give advice in the BEST WAY POSSIBLE, with wisdom and intellect - please THINK before you type. And dont see posting as a guest as a guise for posting irresponsibly and without adequate thought. "

As for verification, what I meant was how do we know that the incident mantioned by the anon person is true? Again read the quote above.

And the final point is I personally do not feel that I am qualified to advise people in issues of personal problems some of which require professional guidence and makes me wonder why would anyone post there personal problems on a youth forum, since they require help from more experts in some cases.

I understand that some people may not have access to professional people, but if I was in that situation I am sure a visit to my GP, or even a chat with a trusted friend or other sources would be more productive.

Final point would be who on here can claim that they are qualified to advice others in complex issues and what if the advise was followed and more problems occured as a result?

[rambant]

I don't (and didn't) deny that the system is susceptible to abuse hence "I think that's part and parcel of cyber life". However, my point was that there are also benefits to be reaped from the section which are precious and that I don't think it should be scrapped.

Kat, on Oct 24 2007, 03:03 PM, said:

Anon section means anyone can post, even a random guest. Their has been quite a few incidents of abuse which has been made public, where people have posted lies just for a joke. Also have you read Yasmins post?

Their is obviously a reality behind her post which can be understood by reading her post.

Yes I did read Yasmins post brother, and thanked her for the advice. I didn't argue with her that she doesn't have a point; that in itself is testimony to the fact that I agree that problems exist.

Kat, on Oct 24 2007, 03:03 PM, said:

As for verification, what I meant was how do we know that the incident mentioned by the anon person is true? Again read the quote above.

I read it bro, honest I did. Allah forgive me for the many times I speak about things without any understanding of them, I pray this was not one such occasion. How do we know whether the incident is true or false? And that goes for non-anonymous members too, there may be forumites out there who are not telling the truth either- save posting reminders, what to do bro?

Kat, on Oct 24 2007, 03:03 PM, said:

And the final point is I personally do not feel that I am qualified to advise people in issues of personal problems some of which require professional guidence and makes me wonder why would anyone post there personal problems on a youth forum, since they require help from more experts in some cases.

Those cases that require specific, expert help obviously aren't going to be settled here. But there are situations that some forumites have experience or knowledge of and can help. The variety of problems posted up there means there are some that can be helped and some that can't.

Kat, on Oct 24 2007, 03:03 PM, said:

Final point would be who on here can claim that they are qualified to advice others in complex issues and what if the advise was followed and more problems occured as a result?

I'm not qualified to advise others in complex issues, not in real life and not on the forum. However, in the few topics that I can offer advice on I try my best. It's up to the anonymous poster to follow or leave any advice given on the forum. Surely the onus is not on the people giving the advice, but on the one taking it?